I'm this huge dilemma, the events of that fateful day haunt my mind ; night after day . Little did I know that some storm approached the shore as I stood guarding Pandora's box with my life . Beans have been spilled, now it's time I had opened my mouth, time I let destiny take its course . Destiny ? did I not always want to hold on to it before it spilled the beans ?! But now I want to let it go, make fun of me, put me through the worst , let it start all over again . My fears have smelt the coffee , dropped my jaw and left me wounded . Ya , I know, no explanations but then it's human nature to explain right?
I say" I love u, you truly are the best thing that ever happened to me , I don't regret a single moment of it,u were my best friend , my lover and most of all u made feel alive again. I'll never forget u for that . You're going to be the very best part of me , I'm sorry it has to be this way , but I've to leave , and u have to see u true soul mate .I'm not the one , I'm just the serious ex. and I'm a liar . A horrible person but I'm sorry . You see, we all need some serious ex.'s so as to keepsake it for experience , I mean, it is how this goes right ? Someone has to be heartbroken , to be shaken to reality right ? "
I repeated the conversation a 1000 times in my head, cursed myself under my breath and trust me, such silence had a sound , the sound of disappearance. Memories span the miles and in seconds I'm back again , there , in the same place . I sob and look at myself , my selfish and insensitive self . Then I look again into the same person, loser it screams .
Yes, I may be the most horrible of people but I'm still here and if I did deserve this or not I don't know but if it's true ; it will certainly walk back in its own time and space.
“How to separate the humiliation from the loss, that's the catch. You can never be sure if what tortures you is the pain of being without someone you love or the embarrassment of admitting that you have been rejected.”
― Stephen Fry, Making History
I say" I love u, you truly are the best thing that ever happened to me , I don't regret a single moment of it,u were my best friend , my lover and most of all u made feel alive again. I'll never forget u for that . You're going to be the very best part of me , I'm sorry it has to be this way , but I've to leave , and u have to see u true soul mate .I'm not the one , I'm just the serious ex. and I'm a liar . A horrible person but I'm sorry . You see, we all need some serious ex.'s so as to keepsake it for experience , I mean, it is how this goes right ? Someone has to be heartbroken , to be shaken to reality right ? "
I repeated the conversation a 1000 times in my head, cursed myself under my breath and trust me, such silence had a sound , the sound of disappearance. Memories span the miles and in seconds I'm back again , there , in the same place . I sob and look at myself , my selfish and insensitive self . Then I look again into the same person, loser it screams .
Yes, I may be the most horrible of people but I'm still here and if I did deserve this or not I don't know but if it's true ; it will certainly walk back in its own time and space.
“How to separate the humiliation from the loss, that's the catch. You can never be sure if what tortures you is the pain of being without someone you love or the embarrassment of admitting that you have been rejected.”
― Stephen Fry, Making History
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