Sunday, 2 October 2011

Un-editied Versions

Somewhere in life there's a deep; strong stroke (*nothing reffered to sickness here) and then u know what u really want from life and think u might get from it. Here's a peice directly from my age old writing;where i regret my loss :

"Sometimes in life, u have to go back to the starting point and start all over again. To face the pros and cons of life once more and know hat u missed out from it.To set ur own limits & ur own defination for the word 'freedom'.to settle in ur own space , get scared and walk ahead of ur fears. To fall out of love (i.e family, boyfriends, husbands, in-laws, friends) and make ur own mark of things. To watch movies, go dancing, try singing, reading to eternity and writing as much as u like. For once a while, leave that blackberry silent and discover the lost person in you. In no time u might pass out, in no time u might give up so live till u can and wait for the time when the sand in the sandbox gets over. Soar above the rest."
 
People often told me to write about happiness, good things , sunshine and blah blah . Have u ever thought of the mind chorea I might have gone through? Even though my pain isn't the greatest in the world, it's still the pinching pain that waers me out too often. I dainlty saved up all the love for the one i loved the most, and now my love, affection & smile has evaporated into the dark . I live for namesake. Tears flow; they flow daily in the fraction of a second. Tears flow; and they take away hope. Tears flow; hot & painful tears flow similar to the red hot blood that once flew.
The fraught presence of life in me is ugly. Very ugly.
I will let it go, with no destinations to cover, and no heights to reach.
I lost love
I lost hope
I lost all I treasured.
and Now I shall lose, myself. Forever and ever.
 
*age old writings of Sonia- An old english lady's story *

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